Don’t Be An Epic Noob!
Getting called an epic noob online? Fine.
Getting called an epic noob by your boss? Not so fine.
Having your friend tell you that you fail for losing to him in a deathmatch? Fine.
Having your dad tell you that you fail at life for getting that speeding ticket? Not so fine.
Every day our brethren are engaged in a form of geekly tourette’s as they rampage through the internet looking for people to troll. So, for all you internet noobs, let’s cover some of the basics that you’ll run across online, and disturbingly too often offline.
Courtesy of Urban Dictionary.
A person, of either gender, whose behavior displays such ignorance/obnoxiousness that you would like to make them wear their own ass as a hat.“Can you believe that my boss is making me stay until 9 pm on a Friday!?”“What an asshat.”
Being unusually large, powerful or wonderful. On a grander scale than the modified word would otherwise imply.
Popular synonyms: Massive, Huge, Incredible, Awesome
“Sasha just gave me an epic blowjob”
Elite = Leet
Leet = 1337.
High quality, upper class, superior, fine, above average, great, wonderful, sinfully good, not an asshat, skillful, wonderful, wizzunderful“Those were some elite moves, my friend.”
“When I kicked those guys asses handily?”
“Yes.”
The act of dropping one’s face / forehead into one’s hand. Usually accompanied by a “thunk” or a cr a cry of “D’oh!”
Today I locked my keys in my car. Again. *facepalm*
A generic insult. It can mean bad, stupid, whatever you want it to mean.
(submitters opinion which I agree):
Don’t say that something is gay as an insult. I find this highly immature, mostly because it is often used when people can’t think of a proper insult even when there is nothing homosexual about whatever they’re insulting.
“Man, these seats are gay. I can’t even see what’s going on!”
A inexperienced and/or ignorant or unskilled person. Especially used in computer games.“Haha that n00b got pwned.”
A corruption of the word “Owned.” This originated in an online game called Warcraft, where a map designer misspelled “owned.” Instead, it said, so-and-so “has been pwned.”It basically means “to own” or to be dominated by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force.“Man, I rock at my job, but I still got a bad evaluation. I was pwned.”
either an interjection used when one disapproves of something, or a verb meaning approximately the same thing as the slang form of suck.1] “you actually bought that? FAIL”
2] “this movie fails.”
“For The Win.”An enthusiastic emphasis to the end of a comment, message, or post. Sometimes genuine, but often sarcastic.
Bob: Your 1up t-shirt rocks
Sally: 1up t-shirts ftw.
The opposite of FTW (For the Win)
An acronym for “For the Loss”
“People who think FTL means “For the Lose” are taking english tests FTL”
In contemporary gamer culture, QQ has become the mainstream emoticon for crying eyes, though it is still often used in it’s traditional sense.“Shut up or QQ!”
“Why don’t you QQ, noob?”
A dumbass who makes idiotic posts in message boards newsgroups for the sole purpose of pissing people off, often lacking in intelligence. Sometimes compared to people who pass you by on the sidewalk then grab you in inappropriate places.1. “AAAAAAHH, it’s a troll!”
“Protect the women and children! Grab your torches!”
The ultimate, above all, the best, top, something that nothing is better than. Also Über“I’m Über confused…”
An interjection similar to “YAYE!” or “Woohoo!” used to express joy or excitement, usually about some kind of accomplishment. Primarily used by gamers, spreading rapidly to anyone who chats online

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Trolls bug the hell out of me. I used to blog for this wrestling site (I know, let the haters begin! Yes, I know it’s fake!) and this one guy would always have to intervine and try to piss me off. Well, sadly, it worked, and I got sick of it and left. Trolls are just miserable jerks who should all just be locked in their own community and have their very own internet server, so they can just insult themselves.